I am writing this prayer for my aunty, a loving person, who passed away late after midnight last night. Having gone through a long, painful and grieving battle, she has finally be able to walk free. May her soul rest in God's eternal peace. We will always love you and remember you in our prayers.
Lord, in weakness or in strength we bear your image. We pray for our loving aunt; who lived her life as a wife, a mother, a friend, a relative and forever your faithful servant, who now live in a land of shadows, where the light of memory is dimmed, where the familiar lies unknown, where the beloved become as strangers.
Hold her in your everlasting arms, keep her safe in your love, and grant to all those who care a strength to serve, a patience to persevere, a love to last, and a peace that passes human understanding.
Almighty Father, we thank you too, for you have made each of us in your own image, and given us gifts and talents with which to serve you.
We especially thank you for our loving aunt, for the years we shared with her, for the good we saw in her, for the love we received from her.
Now give us strength and courage to leave her in your care, confident in your promise of eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.
Amen.
God our Father, Your power brings us to birth, Your providence guides our lives, and by Your command we return to dust.
Lord, those who die still live in Your presence, their lives change but do not end. I pray in hope for my family, relatives and friends, and for all the dead known to You alone.
In company with Christ, Who died and now lives, may they rejoice in Your kingdom, where all our tears are wiped away. Unite us together again in one family, to sing Your praise forever and ever.
Amen.
*a moment of silence*
If tears could build a stairway, And memories a lane, I'd walk right up to Heaven And bring you home again
This has got to be one of the most hilarious baloneys I've ever seen and I just couldn't stop laughing watching it!
How can you not laugh after watching that video? It's just so horrifyingly hilarious. I had goosebumps while watching it but at the same time I couldn't stop admiring how grosscute ewwdorable these purple, green, yellow and red watchumasaytheirspecies.
The person who created this video has got to be very jobless and creative to come up with something so weird. HAHAH but it made me laugh.
Okay fine, I'm sorry. No offense to JC all Teletubbies fans =)
HAHAHAHA I really can die from laughing
Compare it with the SHINee's original Ling Ring Ding Dong performance here =)
*****
Here's another video that got me laughing like there's no tomorrow.
ZOMFG!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA
Yeah wtf they were talking about, I seriously had no freakin idea but I know the dude in purple was trying to speak English to the dude wearing white jacket and grey t-shirt, who happened to speak English very fluently.
But it doesn't matter. That dude in purple was just so fucking crazy hilarious.
p.s. OH I'm back from my vacation! I shall update soon. I hope.. x(
There's this saying that I always hear "be very careful of what you say. Do think it over before saying it out" and I think everyone can understand that easily. Even I learned well from that "insignificantly vague" phrase.
Well apparently not everyone. There is this one person... And I have a feeling he is so going to be in big trouble with his boss. I wish you well dude =)
Moving on, exam is finally over as of last Thursday evening and I am well fuhrekkin fuhree! But sadly I couldn't exactly smell freedom right after the exam because I still had to go for one last tiny weeny field trip..
..that I despise despise despise so fuhrekkin much.
So yes there was still that one Biology field trip that I dreaded so much to go. I think I mentioned it last time right? About the BI 1116 Field Ecology Trip to Pulau Bedukang that has been postponed since earlier this year?
Yes? No?
Well anyhoops, the date was set that the trip was going to be held on 6th December 09 i.e. today. This morning actually.
But fortunately for me, God answered my prayers yet again, the trip was postponed for the second time! =) HOLLA BABY!
As always I was probably the happiest one amongst all my Bio course mates. Well funnily, most of my bio course mates in this Field Ecology course are seriously biology enthusiasts.
They are like hard-core biology lovers! And I totally salute them for that because I could never be like them even the littlest bit.
Of course being a biology student that I am still, I do have that little bit of nature-loving side of me.. but it's not that big you see.
When it comes to all those creepy-crawlies and all sorts of hair-tingling creatures, I'd rather listen to some Physics lecture that I had no freakin idea about rather than to touch those creepy crawlies!
Like what creepy-crawlies?
oh I don't know.. like snails?
Okay let's not repeat that snail-y-story all over again. I have had enough of it. EUGH! And yes, that thing above was one of the biggest reason why I couldn't really enjoy much over the past few days after my exam was over.
(Well I did went on a crazy stress-relieving night with Cathy last Friday, it was fuhrekkin awesome! Baru two weeks we did not meet, by the time we met we ended up fighting a lot that night! HAHA it was awesome!)
But oh! When I was reminded of the trip again and again I just could not help feeling
It's not that I do not enjoy field trip. I do! I really do enjoy going on a field trip. In my first year of uni, we had a field trip to Louis's Mini Zoo somewhere in Tutong and you bet I was totally enjoying the trip because I got to hold a fuhrekkin python!
Like a huge ass 7-metre long python. I love it! So yea, snakes are A-OK for me but not snails.
Yes.. the snail was one of the main reason why I didn't want to go to that field trip to Bedukang. See my friends and I were assigned to this one lecturer's group, Dr. L, in that field trip.
And according to one of my friends who had been to that trip a year ago, those who are assigned to work with Dr. L during the field trip would be dealing with a heck lot of snails as well as crawling in the sand.
Like wtf. I'm so going to die loh liddat.
Even for some of my friends, the last time they went there they actually said that there were A FREAKIN LOT, like SUPER DUPER LOT of snails on that island.
My imagination can be super wild and I was already imagining gajillions of snails dominating that island, living happily ever after.
Not enough with the normal snails that we see here, the snails on that island are probably like one of those highly evolved snails since they are quite geographically isolated.
They probably eat meat too..like us, humans.
I really want to die loh~
BUT OH THANK YOU GOD THE TRIP IS POSTPONED! WOOT!
So I can officially, safely say I am free from UBD and free from exam. Oh free from snails too
And since it's officially holiday for us now, I am even more excited that tomorrow we will be leaving on a jetplane!
HOLLA VACATIONS!!
So what that we are not going to another country across the sea, it's still a fuhrekkin vacation! This time with da famili!
Yes I am that excited that I wanted to start packing for this trip since last week! hahaha
Those of you who have been following my tweets you would have known that I bought new luggages for myself last week, my eldest brother gave me his card so I went on a crazy hunting spree with my two lovelies for the luggages!
And you noticed I wrote 'luggages' instead of 'luggage'? Yes, I am that kiasu too. I bought two new luggages: one of medium size and the other of a smaller size.
Well I've given the smaller-sized luggage to my younger bro yesterday =) Why would I need two luggages anyway? HAHAHA
Oh oh during my vacation too, I would probably be meeting one of my friends there! Well I'm pretty nervous about meeting this one friend of mine though. I haven't seen him over a year (I think) and I just don't know how it will be like when I finally see him again in the next few days.
Would it be kinda awkward? See I told you that my friends and I..most of the times we do not keep in touch but you know.. if we want to meet.. we just arrange a day and time and meet. That's just it. No broken strings whatsoever. Everything is still the same even if the personalities changed.
And I think it applies to most of you too right? hehehe. Well, let's just see how it will go. I'm not keeping my hopes high even if this friend of mine has been such a sweetheart since the day I knew him.
Oh did I tell you that my family and I are actually going to Kota Kinabalu, Sabah?
Well hello there Land Below The Wind!
It has been ages since I've last went there. I was still in high school the last time I was there and I could barely recall much of the city. But one thing I know, shopping was one hell of a fiesta there and zomg! I just cannot wait to go shiiooooppping!
Yes you read me right, shiopping! Literally spelt shiopping because I know shopping is just so shiok even if I am alone! And boy I sure can really shop alone!
shiok + shopping = shiopping! woot!
And I am just well surprise that I can write a heck lot of crap in one night. I don't even know what would make a good title for this post later (but I usually came up with something in the end -.-)
Well the past few weeks had been dreadful and amazing at the same time. There was a good balance between stress and leisure so I think it was all well worth it.
With the boyfriend around, everything just seem too beautiful to miss =)
I love this song. It has been out since last month but I just could not stop listening to it from time to time. Somehow I just found the melody quite peaceful and relaxing and it sorta gave me this positive vibes... I don't know.. that was how I felt though.
Sometimes we make mistakes, you know? Sometimes you feel like a broken angel on the ground (It’s OK, we're not perfect. We ain’t perfect!) Sometimes you feel like a symphony without a sound (I told you it’s OK, coz we are young!)
This song was intentionally released as commercial music video to promote Samsung Anycall but I think it was more than just a commercial. Samsung went all the way to make a unique story line about this song.
To be honest with you I was rather confused because I could not tell what exactly was the main point of the videos. But it was really creative of them though, if you watch the videos, you would notice that not only they were promoting Samsung Anycall in all the music videos but at the same time they were also conveying a positive message in the ending of every videos.
That tomorrow is a brand new day
It started with four girls all coming from different backgrounds, each having their own talents and faced different kinds of obstacles in life. The only thing they have in common then was that they all knew one guy, the guy who opened a cafe called Tomorrow.
And zomg it was Lee Dong Gun! And he was the one guy with a big hope =)
So I'm not going into details about the story line of the four girls but you can check it out in Youtube. There are 6 videos just for this commercial, can you believe it? That has got to cost a large sum of money but oh well, Samsung is a big corporation =)
And I am a huge Samsung lover ;) Here are the links to the videos:
Oh.. my mobile phone is featured in one of the videos above =)
And yes, I could see that some of the story lines may not be that inspirational, if I must say, but I really love Ga In's and Uee's story. Those two videos are probably the ones that I could relate to the most.
I'd love to think of myself as a little sensitive sometimes. In a way that.. I get touched easily by stories that bring messages of hope. Even a short story that has a strong message, it could leave me teary-eyed that easily.
Especially the kinda story that leaves you feeling like smiling even after having gone through a bad day, because you know.. that there is always light at the end of the tunnel.
If you had seen the first video, there was that part towards the end when Ga In was very sad because she was defeated in the tournament and that she had let her team down. Her team was being supportive, they tried to console her but she still could not help feeling bitter for letting everyone down.
And you know..how..sometimes even if you have the whole world telling you that 'it's okay', they still could not make you feel better, but sometimes right.. all you needed was to hear it from just one person..
The right person.
All it takes is just one right person to say.. "it's okay" to you and it will definitely make you feel a lot better after that.
Did you see in the first video? When Ga In's father gave her that reassuring look after her defeat, she could finally smile after that. It totally brought sunshine to her rainy days.
And that made me cried a little, not because I was sad but because I just could relate to how she was feeling at that instant. Well I had that situation when I had just finished my A' Level exam three years ago.
See if you had been through something similar, then it would definitely moved you when you see it happening to another person. I'm pretty sure some of you might have had the same situation.
And then in Uee's video, it was not that I had a dream of being a model and failed. No, I do not. But there was just one part which I could relate very well to and it was almost similar to the story line in the first video.
It was some time in the middle of the video when Uee was texting Dong Gun after she failed her first runway debut on the stage and she was so afraid that she could not get back up again after that. And I love Dong Gun's reply after that:
"you cannot get back up if you had not fall"
And that particular line reminded me of a situation I was in some time ago. I wrote about this in One Foot In Front Of The Other last time but right now, I just feel like sharing it with you guys.
Just like everyone else, it was not like I have never fall by myself all these times... I had my fall a lot of times. In fact, far too many times in these 22 years that I have been living. And most of the times I would pick myself up, learn from it and try to start anew.
Because I knew I was strong enough to face it.
Yet there was one time when I felt like I was caught in a downward spiral of negative emotions.. I tried to get back up and instilled some positive thinking but unfortunately the more that I tried to pull myself up, the more I was falling deeper and deeper into the ground.
I felt like something just had to go very wrong that no matter what I tried to do to make things better, it would all break into pieces.
To the people who had always loved and cared for me, I have let them down too many times. Even if they had tried to show their support for me, telling me that it was okay, I just felt utterly ashamed of myself for letting them down.
The feeling was even more bitter when I knew I could not rely on myself any longer. That I have failed myself.
And the next thing I know I was caught in deep thoughts about my own future. How could I see a bright future for myself with that situation I was in at that time?
I felt like I have let myself down too much that the lights at the end of the tunnel was slowly fading away already and giving up seemed to be the best solution for me at that time.
It was a great thing that each and everyone of us are meant to have friends. At least one, if not a few. I have always had amazing friends who never fail to watch over my back, to catch me when I fall.
I really love them because they are probably one of the best people I have ever met in the whole world, I couldn't be more thankful than that. And the greatest thing about having them as friends is that, I don't have to say much.. They just know when I need them..
That's why they say that Friends are like angels sent from above
See at that time, I didn't talk to any of my friends about my then-current situation. I just kept it all to myself. So even if I was hurting inside, I still didn't feel like telling anyone about it because I thought that they must have had enough of hearing from me.
At that time, all I wanted was just to be left all alone.. And suddenly someone came to me and just talked to me. I could have argued and said "Leave me alone" but I didn't.
Up till today, I was thankful I didn't ask him to leave. I could still remember what he said...
Sometimes I feel like my life is just like a baby who's just learning how to walk. Like a baby with his mother holding his hands and giving him support, filled with her tender care and love, she made him stand.. and taught him how to walk, but his feet were still a little too weak to support him, and that made him fell down.
He wanted to cry but his mother, who held on tight to his hands, was there... and she helped him to get back up. So he stood up and tried to walk again.
This happened so many times and he fell so many times too. But he had always had his mother who cheered and supported him from the back all the time. With every steps he took, he was progressing well and getting stronger every day.
Then there came a time when he was confident enough that he could walk by himself so his mother let go of his hands. He was free to walk by himself. He was very happy, he could not stop smiling and he felt like he was on top of the world.
But he was unaware of the obstacles ahead of him. He tripped and he fell down again. He fell down really hard this time and his mother was not there to hold his hands. He began to cry. He cried so hard.
And the mother came to him and she said,'it's okay. When you fall, just stand up.. it is with every fall that you learn to stand up and walk again'
Don't you think so?If I had not fall, I wouldn't know how to get back up again.
I just suddenly lost my mood to write after reading some of the articles that I came across just now. Initially I had this whole sort-of interesting stuffs to write about but they just got flushed out of my brain after reading those articles that I've read. The only reason I lost them all is because I cannot help thinking why do people like to leave comments that are obviously stupid beyond arguments?
The article that I read just now was not at all that complicated to start with. The writer clearly wrote his opinions well and even showed how his opinions are reliably questionable to a certain extent. Even when I read that article I felt that the writer was being really reasonable that I sorta agree with what he has written.
(I'm going to post it in One Foot In Front Of The Other as it is completely politics. I am trying my best to not raise issues since I am still an undergraduate studying in a uni in Brunei)
And I believe some of you who are news-followers must have came across that article too. I don't know about you guys but I felt that article was really reasonable, it was those commenter who made the whole thing sounded very nonsense. Not enough with that they actually commented without giving proper reasons.
oh yeah I get irritated with people who comments blindly.
Arguments are necessary though some may be irrelevant, but at least give a little reason why you can possibly disagree with the writer. When I was reading the comments written by a lot of the people who read that article I felt quite stupid really.
For one thing I had no idea if they actually understood what the writer was trying to say.
Secondly, some of them commented with those really stupid comments like "bla bla bla..because I said SO!", like who the heck cares if you said so? (well if you're just playing around with your friends, it's okay lah but for someone who barely knows you.. no.. no..)
By saying that, obviously the commenter already showed his/her flaws in arguing to the writer's main point. The commenter actually could not argue sensibly thus could only gave such weak and boring reason as if what the commenter said could change the whole world.
Third, "it's passed already, why do you still bring this up??" Just because it has already passed, it does not mean we can just walk off and forget about it already. It's like simply finding a victim to admit criminal offense, if he/she admits guilty sentenced him/her to jail even without any proofs and then case closed without any further investigation.
What if he/she is paid to admit guilty to protect the real criminal offender? What if there are other proofs that show that the real offender is not the person who admitted guilty? Now that is when things should get complicated. Just an example okay.
But for this article, it was not suppose to be complicated at all. In fact I believe the writer was just trying to make us all think and reflect between the rights and wrongs. I simply thought that he was very intelligent by coming up with such solid explanation.
Furthermore, what the writer wrote were all based on facts. We are no dolls in this world to simply live our lives like how others think we should be living. It's a way of enforcing justice.
Okay so maybe that justice part was a little too much. Let's just say he was trying to make us think outside the box. He was basically posting a lot of those "what if" questions in an indirect way. And, and.. I think he was merely asking for "what do you think?"
But I wonder why, a lot of these 'active' readers commented negatively and harshly towards the writer. See I am one very 'passive' reader. I like reading a lot of articles that I find very interesting online be it politics, religious or entertainment. I just love reading articles but the only 'bad habit' that I tend to have is that I seldom leave comments after reading the articles.
I do leave comments on some articles... just for the fun of it and out of curiosity (just to see how they will reply my comments) but most of the times I just read and leave silently (or laughing away behind the screens..because it was one heck of a very hilarious article).
But you see, that's the point of commenting. You are welcomed to leave comments, it could be positive or negative and you could either agree or disagree. If you disagree, why? There is always one - if not a few - reason why you could have disagree with the writer. Maybe the writer's fact was wrong or maybe the writer was being biased, well whatever it is, it's better to clarify and explain than to simply say "No you are wrong and I am right because I said so"
One of my previous posts "One Love That Triumphs Over All Hatred" was quite a good example if you want to see what I mean. It all started because of that post actually but the comments were all posted in the next post "Does She Care?" Now for those of you who had no idea what happened then, go ahead and read the comments.
And this is what I have to say about that now, see I let it slipped for so long only because I didn't think it was really important. But I'd love to say a little something here.
After a whole long essay that Shim wrote, UnoeWho replied "none of that matters". And I was thinking "then wtf matters?" See even in the end I was still not satisfied. He came thinking he knew what he was going to say but sadly I did not get any clear-cut view of his intention in the first place. And you know what was the stupidest thing he did? He came too soon and in the end he made a fool out of himself (I bet he didn't even notice it though. They must have thought that they have played the angels trying to save the day. ZOMFG SO WTF LAH! HAHAH). Do you know why? Because he gave me the answers that I've already found like way way earlier. And I even have a feeling that when he read the replies, he only read through. pfft. Like wtf right? Obviously he did not understand my point from the beginning. Heh, I wasted my time.
So moving on.
Going back to what I was saying earlier. Give argument a little bit. And no, "because I said so" or "biar tia wah, ko sibuk kenapa? It's my blog so I have the rights to say anything I want here" are not the kinda things that people would look forward to hear.
Make your argument sounds reasonable a little even if it is not so strong or based on facts, or it could be just your opinion, it's okay, because by the end of the day whether you win or lose in your argument or your opinion is agreeable or not, at least you are learning something from it.
But you know some people.. mati-mati also want to win.. aihh.. that's a little tough though. Sometimes it's best to just keep quiet and just have a good laugh about it later.
And that is what the power of debate is all about. I think I might have drifted off a lot on this matter. HAHA. You guys might be very clueless as to what I am talking about now since I am not going to put the link to that article here. Well if some of you happen to know what I'm talking about and thought that I could be wrong with what I said, then do email me about it.
OHHH!! That was also one of the reasons why I decided to close the comment box keep all comments moderated. You know some people tend to leave comments or ask some things that obviously do not require me to reply because the answers are written in my post. Don't get me wrong, the comment box is still there. Your comments are all there too, I just do not publish them now =)
Anyhoops, I found this one more article which I thought might give you a little insight to what I was blabbering about for the past fiveten fifteen minutes. This article is nothing big on politics. No wait, it is big on politics in the entertainment industry in South Korea though. Click here. And when you're at it, read the comments, you'll see what I mean.
Most of the commenters were pretty ignorant, don't you think? "I don't care what you say, I still think they deserve to win" but why?
I actually laughed so hard when I read some of the comments. Oh be warned there are over 300+ comments. I hope the numbers will not get bigger but it'll be fun to read though. Yea I actually read that whole lot of comments. It's just crazy and funny.
Hmm I wrote a heck lot. For someone who is suppose to be on 'hiatus' I should not be blogging but wtf do I care, I did the same earlier this year when I was having my second year final exam.
Some of my friends have already started their exam today. Poor peeps, must have been hard to swallow the fact that our exam started on a Sunday. I felt that way too..initially. But after that, come to think of it, instead of whining and complaining about it.. why not reverse the whole situation. Say.. isn't it kinda cool.. you know... to have your exam on a Sunday?
Tell me how many universities do that ha??
Oh I might get spammed a bashing from some people after this. I might. I don't know. You know how...people reads this blog and feels offended even though in no way I was trying to offend any one of them.. Oh well..
It's like having your boyfriend wearing red undies outside his pants and strut down the road acting as if he's super cool liddat. And then you put the blame on Superman for making your boyfriend look foolish liddat.
Can Superman be blamed really? He didn't even know it would become a trend and that your boyfriend would be stupid enough to follow it. hahaha Just an example lah.
I hope you get my point. Putting the blame on another person who has no fuhrekkin idea that he/she was the cause of the whole wtf baloney you were talking about would only leave you looking like a fool later. That's my opinion though, if you think otherwise, let me know =)
****
I fudging love this song and the choreography is super awesome! Well done Aimee Lee Lucas!
CL & Minzy - Please Don't Go
ZOMG I am just so in love with this song! Powerful voices and performance from CL and Minzy, just proves these two girls are all about pure talents. And don't you just love seeing Ms. Aimee Lee Lucas dancing along side CL and Minzy as well as all the other dancers? omg! You're just so awesome Aimee!
It started with Taeyang and TOP's song "Friends" that I kept repeating on my playlist. Then there was Taeyang's "Where U At". And then there came Park Bom's "You And I". Before long, Taeyang came again with "Wedding Dress" and now CL and Minzy (also from 2NE1) with "Please Don't Go". I super love these people! These songs just keep repeating over and over again in my playlist!
And this next one is so fudging funny I'm telling you.
ZOMFG This is why I super love Dara (oh hey, she's from 2NE1 as well!). She's just super funny! And lookit Lee Hyori, she just couldn't resist dancing along to the song! Don't forget MC Yoo Jae Suk too. He's crazy funny! I could really die from laughing!
Well this one is not as funny but it's just crazy to see these guys trying to look cute with the songs. =D
****
I tweeted about this yesterday about me having some sort of unusual liking towards guys who look like vampires. And again let me say this, no it is not because of Edward Cullen okay. I have not seen New Moon yet and I am not in rush to see it. My days of Edwardrools are for long gone. HAHA.
I was just saying, I am somehow attracted to guys with fair skin (like super pale), wear dark clothes (preferably black) and just look somewhat goth and cool liddat. Minus the whole-body tattoo and multiple piercings because that just puts me off so much. One or two tattoos and piercings are acceptable. Well let's just say a decent looking goth (if there is ever such thing)
See as much as I try to make myself wear colours these days, I couldn't help the fact that I love the colour black a heck lot. And blood red too. It's just so pretty. I used to say I liked blue but to be honest, I didn't really dig the colour that much. I actually made myself to like blue last time, just to keep people happy.
This blog, the layout, initially I wanted it black and red but I have received reviews in some of the blog communities telling me that it hurt their eyes to read with black background and bright coloured fonts. So I thought I'd go for white background for a new change then. Well that was the short story behind this new layout.
d'ohmg! this is hot!can I have this?
okay enough about that.
And I only said this because I met saw some people who were dressed in all black and have pale-coloured skin walking in a group last night. They really caught my attention! And if it was not good enough I couldn't stop thinking about them! Not in a way that I felt like I was fallen madly in love okay, I was just thinking why, how and what thingimabobber.
Then I was on Youtube this afternoon (just f.y.i. I took the whole day off of revising today. And I am all guilty about it now -.-) and I found this video by 2pm.
No, I did not mean I found the video at 2 0'clock in the afternoon, the name of the group itself is 2PM.
I never really took notice of these guys all these times, let alone listening to their songs. I heard about the scandal with their ex-leader but I never really dig so much into their stories. But just this once I think I am in love with these guys. Just this once okay.
ZOMG Vampire-image ♥!!!! Oh yes I am so in love with these guys, especially that guy who was wearing half-sleeved shirt. You couldn't have missed him, he was the only one without the long sleeve and he looked so bloody smoking hotcoldOh I'm so confused-.- sexy!
Well I think he is sexy ONLY in this video clip though. Just this one. And I think their dance move is super cool too! Especially at 1:20 - 1:27. Go cheggit out!
Had this quite an interesting discussion with a group of friends in church just now during our usual Wednesday night VYA Faith Formation session. It was one of those simple talks that got me deep into thinking and thus reflecting on the words of God. I just had this sudden urge to write this down and I hope it will be a good one.
One of the key point of the discussion just now was that 'All of us who are baptized, are called to evangelize, to be missionaries, to preach the good news to the world'. At first, I felt like this key point was a little too strong for most of us - or rather, someone like me - who is just still very new in this reaching out thing and being a missionary thingimabob.. Totally something that's too big especially when I am making a slow progress with the foundation of my faith.
It was like the word 'missionary' was the thing that made me stepped back a few steps because I felt like 'whoa, no way.. I am not there yet'. A word so big that no matter what I am doing now to strengthen my faith in God, I don't think I will ever be ready to be one.
Well I used to have that feeling like I was ready to reach out to the world. It came to me after attending World Youth Day in Sydney last year.
At that point in my life, I have never felt so overwhelmed with God's love for the world and each and everyone of us.. And being able to witness it in the eyes of many young people that came from all over the world at that time, all came with the same reason: for God, it was truly an amazing occasion that I have missed for far too long. Young people of all races gathered, prayed and worshiped God without acknowledging anyone's background, it was something so remarkably astonishing to me... that at one point I felt so sad to point of breaking down.
I was so sad because I felt like I have wasted most of my teenage years with something rather useless when I could have been part of this celebration earlier. But where was I all these times? Yet I didn't want to let that thought stop me from being withdrawn again so I decided that I should set my mind straight. I was determined that after WYDSYD 08, I was ready to be part of all the young people in the world who are ready to dedicate our lives to God, no matter what it takes.
And by the time that I was back in Brunei after WYDSYD 08, everything was falling into place very nicely. I had started going back and forth to church every now and then, and proud as I must say, I was enjoying every bits of it. For the next few months after that everything was all good to a certain degree but sadly that was just as far as it could go. I couldn't pursue it any further because of the situation that we are in now, that we are in fact, still in a Muslim country. And I respected that.
Then again, I didn't think that should become a thick barricade wall between me and God. I felt there could have been something else that I could do. I was still overwhelmed.. I just had to do something about it. I had this burning desire to do something for God.
But I met this one person who was not a Christian, but I felt that his knowledge on religious matter was well nourished and very strong on historical facts. He wasn't exactly the most religious person I have ever met, in fact, he was pretty young.. just about the same age as I am.
The only difference was that he knew more than I know about my own religion. I felt very ashamed of myself at that time and I was beginning to feel withdrawn again. I felt like I was in no place to be a missionary even when the words said by someone, supposedly, so insignificant could destroy the foundation of my faith.
That was when I was offered that Mission Trip to East Timor. It came at the wrong-est time ever, I swear, at the time when I faith was shaken to the ground.. the time when I should have said "NO" but what came out was the otherwise.
It was a good thing we started the VYA Faith Formation night every Wednesday earlier this year. It was from there that I know that I have to fully nourish myself with knowledge of my own religion and the historical facts behind it. And from there I have also started to join the Bible Study session every Monday night..taking it slowly and one at a time.
One of my friends shared his experience, just now, in which he was caught in a dire situation where you just ought to say 'no', but you ended up saying 'yes' instead. And the next thing he knew, he was on the stage shaking hands with the Pope. Yes, that was Aubs.
I had the same situation when I was being offered to go on that Mission Trip to East Timor. I said "YES" and I didn't think of the consequences. The next thing I know I was in East Timor along with four other amazing friends!
Funnily I said 'YES' and you know how sometimes, only after you said that then you started thinking "what the hell was I thinking?" or "wait, did I just said YES?" and indeed that was how I felt afterward. But I didn't let it bother me after that because apparently, the Mission Trip slipped off of my mind after that.
And yet God works silently everywhere around us.. In you, and in me. He works all the time. Take this, I am very sure that God did not made me say 'YES' to that Mission Trip in vain. It was like He was saying to me, "Steph you said 'yes' and you will definitely go for this trip. There is no turning back now. Don't worry about anything else now,just leave it all to me".
And the next thing I knew, after months of forgetting about the Mission Trip, I was suddenly reminded of the trip by my own parents. Not only that, God really did work everything wonderfully for me, all the insecurities that I had days after I said "YES" to the Mission Trip: financial status, uni holidays, permission from parents.. He really worked it all out for me.
Having said all these, what exactly is my point in writing all these up and what has any of these got to do with being a missionary or evangelizing? I don't exactly know you see, but I'm about to find out sooner or later. I'll just keep praying that God will eventually lead me through the path that He has chosen for me. I know that even right now He is continuously working in each and everyone of us. So I'm not just going to sit down and wait for the 'spark' to happen. I will seek for that 'spark'.
And maybe.. sometimes we may think that we are not good enough to evangelize because we know the knowledge of our faith is just not rooted deep enough but it's okay. It takes time to really built your roots deep into the ground and strengthening it before it could support you to go taller and higher.
"I can’t do it God," I told Him. But He says, "You can do all things" ( Phil ippians 4:13)
Just to clear things out, to be honest with you, I am not writing all these to boast of my "privileges" or as to sort of doing my bits of evangelizing through blogging.
No, I am not.
In fact what I have written thus so far basically serves as a reminder to myself, that I have always been blessed by Him and maybe I have just not realised it all these times. That's why I am writing it down now, because I want to remember what wonderful things He has done for me. And these are not just it. There are obviously more than just that. I am sure you have experienced the same =)
And for all these blessings, I just cannot stop thanking God. What better way there is to thank him than to spread the good news to the world? =)
I remember one of my friends said that one of these days, there is never a time when you have just one person who comes to you saying "oh hey, I'm having a good day today. You know I've always had a pretty bad day all these times but today, it may not be perfect, it may not be too good, but it's just good enough. And I thank God for that" Do you?
And I think I have been through a lot of those times when you know, you read the word of God in the Bible so many times and yet it was never really pressed through in you until someone, somewhere said the same thing and suddenly you felt like, "oh hey, I've heard that before..but where?" and the second you realised that it was the word of God spoken through the flesh and blood of human, that was when you felt like it just made so much sense to you.
Well the next time it happened, stop whatever you are doing just for a few minutes. Reflect upon the words and smile.. God had just spoken to you =)
"Just leave it all to Him," a friend said to me as I was rushing through the final bits of my notes minutes before the examination began. I stopped flipping through my notes and I looked at my friend, but he already walked away, into the examination hall. Then I pondered upon the words that he said for a few seconds. I smiled and breathed a sigh of relief.
HOMAIGAD I just cannot wait for this movie! The lead character is Rain =D And to think the movie's premier will be on the freakin 25th November! That's during my fuhrekkin exam!
Take big names like The Matrix's Wachowski Brothers, Babylon 5 writer J. Michael Strazynski, and martial-arts movie legend Sho Kosugi and what do you get? You get Ninja Assassin, a truly out of nowhere ninja action movie.
When a young ninja named Raizo breaks free of the control the Ozunu Clan held over him following the execution of his best friend, he thinks he's put those days behind him and can now function as one of the best assassins in the world. But it's never that easy--after saving a Europol agent from Ozunu's assassins, Raizo finds himself on ground zero right alongside the Europol detective. The two lead the Ozunu on a merry chase through most of Europe, but will they survive? Will they take down the Ozunu clan? Check out the trailer.
Would you believe me if I told you that Strazynski wrote the script for this in just fifty-three hours? Well, okay, he wrote the REWRITTEN script in that time, but it does beg the question: does it show? Or are you going to be all over this one when it comes out this November?
Ninja Assassin Cast: Rain, Naomie Harris, Ben Miles, Sho Kosugi, Rick Yune
Ninja Assassin movie trailer provided by Warner Bros. Pictures. Ninja Assassin opens in US theaters November 25, 2009. Ninja Assassin is directed by James McTeique.
Okay so I may be getting a little over-excited for this movie. I mean you know how certain movies may end up a disappointment in the end, well I'm not biting my nails over that but we'll just see how it goes. Plus this is the second movie in which Rain will be the main character.
Maybe the another big reason why I was getting all excited to watch that movie was because of this next video. Have a watch.
Did you hear that? Rain was speaking freakin English! And he wasn't just speaking typical Korean's engrish but he was speaking English with a well-practiced US accent! HAHA. There are a few times in the interview where you could see him trying hard to find the right words to say, I just find that really adorable!
And did you see the part where the interviewer told him that she'd like to keep the interview G-rated because Rain used the word 'kick-ass movie'? HAHAHA homaigad so cute!
I admit, for those who are not fans of Rain may felt like this guy is quite a snob from the interview. I felt quite that way even as a fan, you could tell from the way he talked in the beginning. I think he was showing off his well spoken English already. HAHA Can Boa beat that? After all they are both in the U.S.
If you had noticed too, there was one time when the interviewer was asking him something and replied in the manner that as if he actually really love the attention he was getting in the streets. Said something like.. it was hard enough for him to walk in the streets of Korea without getting noticed, he was hoping that in the U.S. it would be the same too. HAHAHA
Maybe he really meant it that way, or maybe he just couldn't find the exact words to say! I don't know, really! But it was really funny to see him constantly smiling when he was talking, so fudging cute!
Oh why do I have to be so distracted at the wrong-est time ever? Exam officially starts next week (on a Sunday to be exact) but thankfully mine will start a little later.
Yes, finally after so much grumbling and whining waiting for the exam timetable, it was finally out yesterday! I wonder what took them that long to prepare our exam timetable this semester. Maybe they were trying to avoid a lot of clashes in the exam timetable, because that was what happened last semester.
The exam timetable last semester (even all the previous semesters) had a lot of clashes and it had to be drafted twice! But at least the first raft of the exam timetable in the previous semesters, all came about two weeks before the exam. It is only in this semester that they were taking their sweet time to release the timetable.
Funny that I should mention about that because there are still clashes in the exam timetable! And here's the spicy part, the exam timetable that was released yesterday was not even a draft timetable.
It was is the FINAL timetable.
How the hell do they expect people to sit for two freakin exam at the same time? Oh wait I forgot, we can travel through time what.
UGH no point complaining about that now. I feel bad for some of my friends who still have clashes in their exam timetable. Mine is okay for now, unless they decided to change it again in the next few days. But I hope not. I am quite happy with my exam timetable now.
I think.
I'm pretty sensitive these days. And random too. Okay my definition of sensitive means I actually have psychic powers. I can actually read people's mind now. Like you, I can read what you're doing now.
You're reading what I'm writing here in my blog. Word per word. And by now you've already read until this sentence full stop.
wtf.
No I don't have psychic power okay and I don't wish to have any. Oh well, let's skip that one. I will write about it in One Foot In Front Of The Other because you know why? If I write here, some people become very perasan. HAHAHA! But I couldn't be bothered lah. Still the same bah, what to do? And what else is new? It's never a surprise for me nowadays.
You know what will be a surprise? When that day comes.. HAHAHAHA oh waddapak.
The one weeksix day four-days revision 'week' officially starts tomorrow but we still have classes tomorrow and on Wednesday. Sigh.
It's all for your own good Stephanie.
I have two posts in One Foot In Front Of The Other that needs your attention. So for those of you who have access to that blog, leave your opinions okay =) Thank you very much.
Can I ask for a kick-ass exam? But what if the exam kicks my ass instead? I can kick the exam's ass back too right?
After dominating the charts for a few weeks, Park Bom's "You and I" is in the competition with a fellow YGE, Taeyang, who is now back with another new single "Wedding Dress"!
And ZOMG I just have to agree that this is yet another brilliant song from YGE! His first solo single "where you at" has already got me playing it on loop for more than a hundred times since the day it was first released, then came Park Bom's "You And I" which is still a FAVOURITE until present... and now we have "Wedding Dress" by Taeyang, it's just a big HIT!
Such a sweet song sung by Taeyang. I was really attracted to the piano bit at the starting. It was really really beautiful. I don't care if you guys are telling me that G-Dragon's songs has more variety in terms of sounds and creativity.. and that you'd think Taeyang's songs..most of them basically sound almost the same.
What lah, that's why you call it RnB lah. I love it that it has a smooth flow and they emphasize on the quality of the singer's vocal in the song.
I mean, come on! Have you seen GD's "A Boy" MV?
hmmmmmmmm.................
I still like Big Bang overall okay, as I said, it's just that.. GD's songs are just not my liking. He's just weird
(I'm just out of vocabs-.- I'm suppose to finish my assignment now! What am I doing here?? ughh UBD library has become a fish market. ptui!)
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I love receiving your emails. All of you, thank you so much! I am sorry I have not been able to reply sooner, as my exam is coming in a week's time. But I will try my best to reply as much as I can. And thank you also to sunshine_lollipop for the encouraging words =)
